Expectations

Lately I have been meaning to write about this and have not had time to put my thoughts down. So now that I have a minute I want to talk about somethings I have been learning over the last few months. Yes, I have been MIA for a while in the blogging world. Work in the fall always seems to get the best of me!

Recently I have really been pondering life. Really been thinking about all the expectations we put on things. So many times my expectations become limitations of what could be. I get so wrapped up in life and in things going one certain way that I forget about all the possibilities that are out there. You could say that in the past I have had a rather "one track mind."

However, this is changing! I no longer think everything is just black or white. There are many possibilities. Related to this topic comes the idea of dreaming big. DREAM BIG. God says ask for anything in my name...So why don't we? Why have I not really asked for big things in the past? Do I feel like I don't deserve them? I am not really sure yet but what I do know is that this has become very clear to me lately.

I want to dream big and ask God for anything and watch how He unfolds the endless possibilities. There are so many different ways something could go. I have realized that it is exciting not scary to not know what is next. I realized that I ask and dream for things that are far to small. My new focus is not limiting myself or the possibility that anything is obtainable. That God will fill my deepest desires and make them even better than I ever expected.

Blogging Break

It has been months since I wrote. Totally skipped August all together. I think I was hoping that if August was slow maybe, just maybe September would never get here. However, sigh, it is here as usual. Fall use to be my favorite season. I loved it in college and such...College when there really wasn't a care in the world. How did it all change really??

Taking a blogging break from work. Gearing up for our big House Party event coming up on Thursday. I get so nervous right before these big events. Everything is ready to go as far as I can tell. However, I hope all the plans I have been making on paper and over email come to pass as it should. By now I should be use to something going wrong. No event is ever perfect. There is always some hiccups...

Anyway, should get back to work. Pulling my hair out with final details. After Thursday I will have one down and only 11 more to go...Could always be worse though right?

The Ultimate Glow Stick

So sometimes I crack myself up. Like today. I don't know where I come up with these silly analogies but I hope it makes people laugh. So today I compared God to the Ultimate Glow Stick..Yeah, that's right. I was sending some encouragement to a friend who was talking about God giving us blessings even in our dark times. And I shot back with God is the Ultimate Glow Stick.

It got me thinking all day. He is...When I am in my darkest times I know my way out is God. I know that no matter what bad stuff happens or what curve balls life sends me I know that God is going to make things good. He always has blessings for me. Even though it doesn't seem like the light is in sight it always is.

Yeah, God is the Ultimate Glow Stick...

WEEDS...

So tonight I did some weeding in my yard before the rain came! I did not realize how fast those little buggers grow. I had them everywhere and then I move onto the backyard to cut down two very over sized weeds that have now morphed into small trees. The roots are so big that I think it grows all under my deck. I realized too that some of the weeds are beginning to grow threw my deck. What was I thinking to let it get this wild.

However, it got me thinking about how quickly these bad things spread. Sorta like the bad habits in our life. They start out small tiny weeds and if we take care of them right away they go away but if we ignore them they grow and take over. So many times I think I let things grow and get bigger than they need to be. So often I could nip the bad habits in the bud before they cause lasting damage but usually I am too lazy and ignore them because my pride gets in the way.

I don't want to ignore the little things in my life that make me separated from God or treat people incorrectly. I want to be sure to keep myself in check! It is nice to know that at any point though, no matter how big they might get, God always has the bottle of weed killer to keep me in check!

July 19...

Well, six years ago yesterday I got married. And now it has been two years since my divorce. I have some great friends who gave me a call to see how I was doing yesterday with it being July 19. However, until they called I had no idea what the date was. Life is moving along well. Sure I can reflect on how right now in 2009 on July 20 I would never have imagined myself divorced but I am learning to lean on God for strength.

Everyday gets a bit easier. Sure there are times I miss being with someone and not being alone but I have good friends and a great family who support me and love me. Even when I was married there were times of loneliness. Now I cling to God even more for strength. I lean on Him for understanding and guidance. I have learned so much about myself over these past couple of years. The places God has taken me has been hard at times but so worth the journey.

I get excited to see how God is going to continue to use me and move me this year and years to come!

Live Your Passions...

Lately I have been really keeping in check with what I am passionate about. I want to use my passions and desires to do what God wants but also because it brings me such joy. Today I was reminded of that in Ephesians 2:10 - "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."

That verse really struck me. I am passionate about things because God has prepared it in advance. I am really looking at what I want to do, where I want to be. What is God calling me to do next, what is He preparing for me? I am excited. I have a few ideas and soon I will share them but for now I am just excited about the next steps Jesus is preparing for me in advance to do!

Sacrifices

Lately I have really been questioning my motives for doing good things. Why do I get so angry sometimes when I keep giving and giving and for what? What will really happen? Who really cares anyway? I came to a bit of an epiphany recently. I do not have to sacrifice the blessings I receive because I feel guilty or for the approval of others but because I want to.

I know that sounds like the easiest concept. Most of you are probably think geez Nicole get a clue...But it was huge for me. So many times I do stuff for the approval of others. Do stuff because I feel guilty. I sacrifice my time, my resources and other things because I feel like I have to not because I want to. Life has been so much easier understanding that I do not have to run this rat race. That my self-worth does not come from what others think of me or from all the stuff I do, especially if I do it with wrong motives!

This might sound selfish but I am starting to do what I enjoy, what I love to do. Because I want to do it. Because it gives me great joy. And I started discipling girls at my church and that is the greatest joy to me. So God does give us the desires of our hearts after all. I am blown away that leading a women's bible study and discipling because I want to has fulfilled me more than words can describe.

Wow, God is good! I guess He does tell the truth...